One of things we don't often give thought to is how our habits shape the things we choose, whether they breed success or failure. I, for example, have become quite a night owl, and anything involving involving early morning rising is something I need to steel myself into, however slow and painful the process may be. Even when I was earning a fairly regular paycheck, I felt like I lacked the needed back-spine to build proper habits and hone the whole of my being into something better than I can imagine it to be, but for years I could never put a finger to what. As close shaves came at me more often I did everything in my power to rise above it and ensure I wasn't on the losing side of the struggle once it was all said and done. No matter how early I had to rise or how much work I had to put it, I was going to make the cut.
Little did I realize that by priming myself merely to make the cut, I set up to eventually miss it by a country mile once my luck ran out.
Why is this the case? I recently heard someone say that their father instilled in them that if they were on time, they were already late, a sentiment that didn't make much sense until I looked back at all the times I busted my hump to get some place in time, with that effort sometimes resulting in less than desirable repercussions. I can still remember the time I forced myself to stay awake through the night in order to make an early morning meeting, which resulted in me quickly phasing in and out of sleep whenever my mind wasn't being stimulated, something that surely did not reflect well on me as a potential leader of the new breed.
Just as I screwed myself, however, I know I hold the power to change all that and make something positive out of what I can do.
If I so chose, I could be more well dressed, more well spoken and well on my way to turning in the needed paperwork to get done what I need to get done, but in order to do that, I first had to take the chaos in my thoughts and sort it out, so that all of my energy had a place to go and is put right to work for me, not against me. As I teach to others about learning Japanese, one cannot grow outside the box if they have no box to think outside of, and it's high time I started building my box, even if I do suck at it. Not everyone starts with top shelf skills at something, and if they let that hold them back from even giving the effort, they can never take that first step.
I am the same, and must throw caution to the wind so I can take more first steps when they matter most.
Had I not done so in my youth, I would surely be much less of the man I am today and much less able to give what I can to the world around me, whether it's insight into the culture and language of Japan, the finer points of English or any other wisdom my travels may give me. I have seen both the mountaintop and lowest valleys of where my choices can take me, and realize more with each passing day how far I can go if I just take the chance and risk failure or success. With seeking employ and figuring out ways to generate income, especially, is this vital for me to learn and let become part of my daily thought process.
No one became well off by waiting for the riches to come to them, even for trust fund babies and those with great inheritances in front of them.
I'm already making strides towards this end, and must continue on, because in the end, when it comes to whether I'm on time for something or not, I want to be able to arrive early and well prepared so I can relax, see this world with a clearer conception and help others reach a similar plateau, if not greater.