The World Beyond The Screen

Often, around New Years time, many become prisoners of the moment and make resolutions their will can't maintain, myself included. In fact, I didn't find the clarity to even make a resolution until I grew more secure in who I was and what I wanted, something my travels have given to me, little by little. This year, with everything I've gone through and all the growing I've been blessed with, I'm certain I've find one I'll commit to long after the moment is over and the normal world stares me in the face.

If there's anything crucial I've discovered as I explored the world around me, it's that despite how easy technology has made it to keep in touch with others, the ability to convey our thoughts to the people we meet everyday is still vital to becoming more connected to our world and creating the desire to contribute positivity however we choose to do it. The fact that my in person skills still need much sharpening has shown me the resolution I want to keep with me as a new year begins and I grow older and more aware of what I want to leave behind: to refine my handling of small talk and become more deft at face-to-face communication.

As it is for many out there, there've been people who've made my life suck, sometimes to the point of emotional breakdown (e.g a fetus-position-on-the-floor, make-it-stop kind of breakdown), and in those times, I wanted nothing more than remove myself from them and never see their face again. Technology has made it easier than ever to do just that and tune out the people who would bring us to this point of mental stress, but the truth is that no amount of advancement will completely eliminate that from our lives; in fact, because we've tuned it out so often, many have grown less able to deal with the daily stress of the day, which means it has much more power to shake us down to our foundation when it starts to pile on.

When I started to interact with the world outside my computer screen, it was like relearning how to talk, more so because I had much less time to mull over my response to someone separated by 3 feet of air, compared to a few miles of fiber-optics. As I see things like smartphones, video conferencing and social networking become more common place, I can notice this effect growing more and more prevalent as people isolate themselves from the world of purely physical interaction, finding more of their voice, sense of friendship and power coming from using technology to communicate.

As a writer, it fascinates me to witness the very way we connect to other change so dramatically, but it concerns me how people are losing touch with the base skills we use to forge relationships and become connected with those we care for. Even before my hands touched a keyboard, I knew that communication is only complete when we can see the person in front of us, their every tendency, tick and odor there for us to take in and analyze as needed. Phones, chatting and so on were only meant to be supplements to face-to-face interaction, but the greater dependency on these things to keep us in touch as our lives grow 'busier' is making them the main method and face-to-face, the supplement.

In time, the abilities to read someone's body movements, separate genuine criticism from harmful language, keep things in perspective and build our self esteem through contributing to the world around us falls and falls fast, as it did for me when I made the net my main method. As contradictory as it may be to use a blog to say this, people have to balance themselves out and make the world beyond the screen a bigger part of their day to day routine; the more we do that, the more we can appreciate what technology does for us and use it to its maximum potential.

I certainly won't say the process is easy, but all the experiences and knowledge my time away from the net gave me have let me know it's a worth while effort. Awkward communication is better than no communication at all, isn't it? Beats going through life with the desires of your heart falling silent, leaving you to wonder 'what if?' as you think about all you could've done, had it been given a voice

A Different Approach

Becoming a proper adult is one of the most difficult things for those from both affluent and penny-pinching households, with the utmost humbling step being admission of our limitations. After all, who likes to admit they’re been in error with their approach, especially when they’re been doing it that way with considerable success? The human ego at once shields us from the sense of despair they create and prevent us from ever learning from them, in some instances to the detriment of both them and those around them. If and when that time comes, the courage must be summoned to face up to their shortcomings, so they may begin discovering the way out of this mire. For me, that time has been long coming, and I’ve become ever cognizant that despite the things, friends and experiences my methods have garnered me over the years, they are not yet the habits of someone worthy of being regarded as a man, and should I seek to walk the many rows a man must walk before they can call him a man, my habits must be taken up to the next level.

I freely admit to being a spoiled slacker in many aspects of life, confident that my way would let me create the kind of life I desire. Although I’m still building funds to move out on my own, my methods have lead me to many wonderful people and created experiences shaping me down to my core, including my time as a tutor for AmeriCorps. With those successes, however, have come failures and shortcomings which still burn in me to this day, reminders of how much I dropped the ball and allowed sure shots to slip through my grasp. Yes, incidents like failing tests, alienating myself from those I call friend and losing things vital to my way of life have taught me much the value of good habits and being more understanding towards others and the world around me, but I’m certain that I have what it takes to build grand and continued success, in both tangible terms and in terms of emotional growth. In order to tap into that, however, my priorities must be rearranged so that things building towards a better tomorrow become reality and the constructive habits I have now can go from being acts I enact in order to slip through to being as natural as breathing.

Of course, to become a proper adult, one must be able to define what a proper adult is, since they aren’t all people who snub their nose at cartoons and riding on the swings(as most tend to associate with adulthood). In my estimation, a proper adult is sure of who they are, knows the path they walk and go beyond what needs to be done for both themselves and those they serve, along with the obvious financial stability, circle of supportive friends willing to challenge them and ability to understand the wants and needs of others with minimal need to ask. I would be a fool if think I could ever make this world function as I see fit, even if I had all the world’s wealth and power in my grasp. No, to reach places otherwise unreachable, I must be able to understand and work within the flow of what’s around me, both by my hand and with the aid of those willing to travel beside me. To me, life will always like a river-sometimes gentle and others violent-and I know few who’ve made the most of their journey along it by trying to work against its current.